Contrary to the character I play on my blog, I do other things than watch My Little Pony and Game of Thrones all day.

                                      You know, Rarity is the lamest. Good pick, Dosh Khaleen.

But seriously, sometime I sports. And this is my favorite sporting event of the year- The Super Bowl; which I can say on my blog without needed to buy the rights to.

About this time last year, I accurately picked the Super Bowl winner by declaring the Packers winning would make a better sports movie (starring BJ Novak)

Thus this Sunday is a matchup between the Giants and Patriots. Who's story is better? Let's look at the storylines:

#1 Eli "Abel" Manning
For Eli's whole career he has been the whimpy younger brother to Peyton "Laser-Rocket-Arm" Manning, God's gift to quarterbacks.

But let's look at the facts:
-Peyton is a stud in the regular season, but
- He's just kinda meh in the playoffs.
-Peyton's been in roughly twice as many playoff games as Eli, but they've won about the same number of games
-All but one of those Eli wins is on the road (NFL record btw)
-They've both won the same number of Super Bowls (one)
-and Eli has never lost a Super Bowl, meaning he beat the Patriots, the team that Peyton could never beat

If Eli wins this weekend, we might have a classic "younger brother gives a more perfect offering scenario". Will Eli outshine Peyton if he wins another Super Bowl. Maybe. If he wins two more, most likely. And with Peyton's career uncertain, Eli's career might be on the up and up.

#2 Tom Brady is Angry

You guys remember this, right?


Yeah so does Tom Brady. That was supposed to be an easy win. That was supposed to cap off a perfect season and move him past Bob Griese for most perfect QB, and give him his fourth Super Bowl win, putting Brady in a tie for most with Terry Bradshaw and Joe Montana. But it didn't. And Brady remembers.
So, do you think the Patriots, who so desperately wanted to beat the New York Jets in the regular season that they stole paperwork form the Democratic National Convention headquarters in the Spygate hotel (or something) are gonna hold back with a second chance to beat the Giants?

#3 Is Tim Tebow in this game?

No, because the Patriots beat him. And the Giants will avenge him. Go Tebows!

#4 The Literal Translation




umm...
If that's the case and the mascots are actually playing each other, how can the Titans ever lose?

..I heard their quarterback Kronos cut off his coach's balls just to prove a point.